A Happy Heart

Dear Elder I,

My heart is full today, overflowing actually. And there is no particular reason. Scenes from the weekend keep replaying like hazy old movies in my mind: Atrain asking me if I was married then telling me with sweet squinting eyes that he loves my pretty hair; Jdog working on his gorilla sitting pose, and kicking and squirming with excitement whenever the light up ball rolls past him on the floor; driving like a crazy woman through the city with Allerina trying to find a church playing the General Young Women’s broadcast; and going on a date with the husband, having him near me—so close, so kind, so considerate.

For the past week or two I’ve felt sort of stuck in a puddle of mud. I’m not sure if it’s the anxiety and stress hanging on from the ER weekend, but every brave attempt I made to pull myself out just sucked me deeper into the mire. But for some reason today I made progress. Nothing all that different happened, but I know that God was helping me see and feel all that is good in my life (rather than focusing on everything I need to worry about). I did remember to say a good prayer this morning. Maybe that made all the difference.

We went to church, and then went to our family’s homes as usual. Maybe it was watching dad play board games with Atrain for an hour, or hearing him say that Atrain is as close as you get to an angel. It might have been mom’s sweet smile and steady spirit that steadied me. Perhaps it was the impromptu violin recital at the in-laws that helped fill my heart with gratitude. Or maybe it was listening to Jdog copy Atrain’s crazy, excited squeals. I don’t know exactly what it was, but I feel refreshed, renewed and full of thanks. Life is good. It’s not easy, but it is good.

JD, you’re not going to recognize Dalliwag when you return. He’s already excited about trying to grow taller than you. He’s well on his way and he still has over a year to work on that goal. It will be fun to see you two side by side when you get home. Also, it sure will be fun for you to meet little Jdog. He is such a sweet baby—a somewhat serious little fellow who makes me work hard for his giggles—but so darn patient and precious. Just what our crazy house needs.

Anyhow my brother, sounds like little Atrain is up. He is complaining he is dizzy. Poor guy. The doctors didn’t have much to offer us in terms of treatment of childhood vertigo caused by LVA. Keep him in your prayers. I love you. Oh—and your lady in waiting told me this weekend that you are “one in a million.” She is sure a sweetheart, but you already know that.

Love, MJ